Friday, August 27, 2004

Things I Learned On the Toilet

 

Venice came up with the answer to last time's question. A Brannock device is the thing a shoe salesperson measures your feet with.

Here are a handful of questions, which I hope will tide you over until I get back:

1) What does the word "mafia" mean in Italian?

2) What were George Washington's false teeth made of?

3) What state has the highest percentage of literate citizens?

4) Which state recycles the most?

5) How long is a moment defined to be?


Good luck!

posted by Krizzer 3:44 PM

Aloha...

 

...which in this case means goodbye.

Yes! Yay! and Hooray! I'm going to Hawaii tomorrow morning! Paradise awaits. I shall be basking and drinking and lolling and lazying and I may summon the energy to lounge. Actually, I've told Andy-man that I want to spend the entire trip under water. (That oughta save on hotel rooms!) Snorkeling. That's the thing I want to do the whole time. Gonna see me some humuhumunukunukuapuaa'a!

Don't cry folks. I know you'll miss me. Just know I'll be thinking of you. Constantly. Ok, maybe that's not quite accurate. I might think of you like once, but it will probably be in that "ha-ha" kind of way. Maybe that's not much comfort. Oh well.

I can't wait for two more hours of work to pass so I can spring out of the building, shouting "I'm ON VACATION!!!"

"Momma, what's vacation? Where Daddy went?"
"It's when you go away, and you don't ever come back."

I WISH!

posted by Krizzer 2:46 PM

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

Things I Learned on the Toilet

 

Yesterday's answer: Avocado means "testicle" in South American Indian. Mmmm. I love avocados.

Today's question: What's a "Brannock Device" used for?

posted by Krizzer 12:51 PM

Monday, August 23, 2004

Things I Learned on the Toilet

 

The word "avocado" is a South American Indian (book doesn't say which South American Indians) word. What does it mean?

posted by Krizzer 2:40 PM

Monday Manners

 

That's it folks. There ain't no more. No more lessons in proper napkin etiquette or where and when and whether it's ok to read a book or play the violin. You're on your own. I hope this time together has served you well. I do believe you're ready to go out there and look down your nose at the poor rustic slob with his hat thrust back upon his head. You're ready to avoid complaining about your servants. You're all set to ignore your guests' coats and canes. Go forth and snobbify!

I, meanwhile, will be searching for something else to entertain you with at least once a week. Any ideas?

posted by Krizzer 2:26 PM